We are experts at complicating our relationships.
Your Attention is not only your time but also a chunk of your life that you will never get back. In this world where there is a constant war for your attention. While you are here investing your precious attention in my writings I’ll make sure that your investment is fruitful that nurtures you and helps you grow.
Once I bought a Rubik’s Cube with the intention to learn to solve it. Initially, it was solved and I had to first scramble it and then solve it. After a few seconds of scrambling it. I was all set to solve it. I started turning the pieces one by one with a strategy. A few seconds passed, and seconds turned to minutes. After a while, I stopped. Mr. Expert Adviser (Those of you who do not know Mr. Expert Advisor, refer to my profile intro) asked me “Why did you stop?”. I said, “The more I try to solve it the more complicated it gets”. Mr. Expert “Why is it getting more complicated?” I responded with frustration “This cube is weird maybe it’s faulty”. Mr. Expert started dropping all the gems “You neither have complete knowledge about this nor guidance how do you expect to succeed without the two most important things? Right now you just have an aim. Use it as fuel to quench your thirst for these two important things and you shall succeed”
It’s rightly said, “Love is not complicated, people are”. We, humans, have an inherent tendency to complicate even the simplest of things. This tendency extends to our relationships, where we often make things more complex than they need to be. We create unnecessary drama, make assumptions, overanalyze, and let our insecurities get the best of us. The result is often a strained and complicated relationship that could have been much simpler if we had only taken a step back and evaluated the situation objectively.
One of the ways we complicate our relationships is by overanalyzing everything. We read too much into every word, every gesture, and every action. We assume that everything has a hidden meaning and that we need to decipher it in order to understand the other person. This leads to a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety, as well as a lot of misunderstandings. Instead of overanalyzing everything, we need to learn to take things at face value and communicate clearly if we need clarification.
Insecurities are another major factor in our tendency to complicate our relationships. We let our insecurities get the best of us, and we become jealous, possessive, and defensive. We start to question the other person’s loyalty, and we become overly sensitive to everything they say and do. This can be a major source of tension in any relationship and can lead to a lot of unnecessary drama. Instead of letting our insecurities control us, we need to work on building our self-confidence and trust in the other person.
A friend of mine, let’s call her Jane was once telling me how happy she is with her boyfriend but the only thing she dislikes about him is that he is emotionally unavailable at times and sometimes doesn’t give her enough attention. To which I asked her “Aren’t you afraid that he’ll leave you someday?”. To which Jane said something that touched me deeply. She said, “I am, But I can’t let that ruin what I have with him now”.
Finally, we tend to complicate our relationships by creating unnecessary drama. We blow things out of proportion, we make mountains out of molehills, and we turn minor disagreements into major arguments. This can be exhausting for both parties, and it can lead to a lot of unnecessary stress and tension in the relationship. Instead of creating drama, we need to learn to take a step back and evaluate the situation objectively. We need to learn to communicate clearly and calmly, and we need to be willing to compromise and work together to find a solution. This reminds me of the words of Jay Shetty “Don’t force them to like what you like, If you like football, go to watch football with someone who likes football”
In conclusion, we are experts at complicating our relationships. We make assumptions, overanalyze everything, let our insecurities get the best of us, and create unnecessary drama. All of these things can lead to strained and complicated relationships that could have been much simpler if we had only taken a step back and evaluated the situation objectively. By learning to communicate clearly, building our self-confidence, and avoiding unnecessary drama, we can build healthier and more fulfilling relationships with the people we care about.
